Ok the other day I received this in the mail and it really made me sit and reflect on my choices when it comes to men. It also provoked thoughts on exactly how things should be. As my blog title states "we have to chose more wisely". Our current situations are a result of all of our previous choices. We have to choose more wisely and take responsibility for our choices!

I often warn women who are contemplating marriage to marry someone who cantake care of them. When a woman marries, it ought to be to someone who iscapable of taking her to the next level. If she comes from poverty, there isno reason for her to get married and still be impoverished. The role of theman is to take her to another place.When she gets married, she ought to dress better, drive better, live better,and eat better, not constantly be in a struggle over where her next meal iscoming from. My grandmother used to say, "I can do bad all by myself". For awoman desiring a mate, the objective, of course, would be to find aChristian man, who's settled, has goals, accomplishments and a job. But agoal-oriented and focused man can't just be approached any kind of way. Sothe woman who seeks this type of stability must make sure that she standsout above the crowd:
1. Make sure your relationship with the Lord is strong and growing.
2. Make sure that you are presentable. Working from the inside out, your presentation should be representative of both who you are and whom you seek.Appearance is a reflection of how you see yourself.
3. Have the ability to hold an intelligent conversation.
4. And most importantly, allow the Holy Ghost to take control. You don'tneed to go after him. He's going to come after you, because after he seesand smells you and knows that you're in his presence, he's going to want toknow who you are! I know there's somebody reading this who has been chasingafter the "man of your dreams," but God says, "Just sit still and allowpatience to have her perfect work through Me."

As always, focus on loving you.
Your Girl,
Valarie

Save Money - Cut Back & Cut Waste

With the economy being the way it is, I have been trying to find ways to say money. Gas alone is killing my pocket and budget. I know that I am not alone in this, so as I find little tips I will bring them to you.



Top 5 Money Wasters:

Here's how to save a bundle



1. Gym memberships. You pay the fee but you rarely attend. Why not call your girlfriends and meet in the part or at the local high school track for an hour of excercise and laugher.

2. Bottled water. You can say good-bye to nearly$550 over the course of a year. Instead, boil and bottle your own tap water. Or purchase a water-filtration system.

3. Cell phone and cable bills. If you've been loyal, call the company's customer service retention department and ask about specials or ways to reduce your monthly bill.

4. Brand-name drugs. Ask your doctor and pharmacist if a generic drug is available. And consider mail-order pharmacies, which often charge lower prices. Visit Vipps.info.

5. Checking account fees. You can save more than $100 a year in fees by selecting a free checking account. Compare rates at Bankrate.com.



Article from Essence Magazine June 2008 issue.



Overall we have to look at what we are spending and find ways to cut back and save money. By all means this is not an easy task but we have to find ways to cut back until the economy bounces back.

Purpose

I believe without doubt that we all have a purpose in life. I think the tell-tale signs are things we are good at , things we like to do. But like myself I think some of us stand in our own way. I think we could accomplish so much more if we just stop over thinking things or questioning it. I am so bad at that. I can over think something until I have just about created a whole other problem. LOL! But just imagine the results if we would focus on our purpose and create the amazing fulfilling life we were placed here to lead. I truly believe we all have that in us. That is my daily task to stay focused on the right things and stop getting in my own way. Its a journey.